"I wish I could laugh."
To describe the 6 weeks that we dated as intense would be an understatement but it also unfortunately ended as quickly as it had began. Maybe I should have expected this from someone who'd been divorced twice but was still in their mid-30's, however, I'm not one to be judgemental.
Things moved fast almost immediately as our first date involved meeting for drinks, a meal and a passionate snog on a train platform followed by the cinema and sleeping together the next night.
I was the first person she'd spoken to and met on a dating app so she must have thought that all the bad things she'd heard had been exaggerated. We then got into a routine of going to each other's homes for dinner, sex and incessant chat and laughter. We really did laugh a lot. I don't think I've done so before with anyone.
I sort of had my doubts about her though. Just small things initially such as her constant use of annoying phrases/words/expressions like 'smashed it,' everyone was a 'legend' and everything was 'awesome.' And her spelling was woeful. Despite having only been going out a few weeks she wanted to go on holiday together and she'd regularly text me saying she was concerned that I'd lose interest in her as she couldn't have more children (she had 3). Her children and 2 ex-husbands were constant sources of topics she'd talk to me about and I'm amazed that she actually married 2 of the biggest bell-ends I've ever heard been told about. Utter useless, immature bastards. One of them even let himself into her house one morning when we were still in bed, even though they'd been separated for a year and it wasn't his house.
She came from a family of high achievers and after hearing her talk on the phone to some of her staff, I got the impression that she could be brutal and normally got what she wanted. However, this was coupled with clear self-esteem issues as she had booked in for a boudoir photo shoot and had made up her mind to have a boob job this year.
I liked being with her though as she was funny, kind and an amazing cook. However, I still had my guard up until Valentine's day. I'm not one for celebrating this ridiculous day but I bought some chocolates for her and we went out for dinner, though this was more due to having a night out than getting lovey-dovey due to a commercial pr event. We spent the night together and I even started rebuilding one of her son's Lego Hogwarts models as she'd dropped it and he was upset.
We had the most incredible homemade roast the next day at hers and I finally felt that I could let my guard down. I always like to take things slowly and she was really growing on me.
We made plans for her to come to mine a few days later to spend the night. In the days that followed, for some reason, I had a funny feeling about her. I'm not one for paranoia or jealousy but by some of the things she'd said to me, I felt that she'd met someone else. Then she cancelled coming over to mine saying that she was ill and I received a text from her a day later dumping me:
I was surprised and I felt sad. And that was that...I think that we could have at least talked about things first and I feel that ending things by text isn't really the done thing by a straight down the line kinda girl. I've also got some expensive looking shampoo and conditioner that she left at mine if anyone wants them. First come, first served though.
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