Date 76

"See the luck I've had can make a good man turn bad."

My first date of 2013 and any thoughts I had that a new year would bring about a change in my fortunes were quickly dashed here.

Having gone back to OKCupid to try my luck again, I was quite optimistic even before I'd met this person. She'd seemed very keen to meet me and sent me her phone number and times when she was free after only a few messages without me asking, so things did seem very promising and for the first time in ages, I was actually excited about this date rather than nervous.

Even before the date started though, my evening got off to a very bad start. Just as I was about to catch my train, I went to a cash point and the ATM inexplicably swallowed my card without warning, so thanks for trying to ruin my night: HSBC. There was absolutely no reason for this to happen as I'd entered the right pin and I wasn't overdrawn. I just didn't know what to do as I only had about a fiver in my wallet. What do you do in a situation like that as I could hardly turn up on a date without any money? I was very close to ringing her up and cancelling but my Knight in Shining Armour suddenly appeared in the form of my sister's boyfriend! Luckily he hadn't gone into work that day as he'd been doing stuff from home, so he drew some cash out for me and even lent me his Oyster card, and I even made my train...what a man.

Despite that little drama and the fact that my train was severely delayed, I managed to get to the bar we were meeting in at the right time and although she was fashionably 15 minutes late it didn't really matter as it gave me time to cancel my debit card and catch my breath.

When she did turn up we seemed to hit it off straight away and we had so much to talk about. Being 4 years older than me meant that we had almost identical reference points in terms of music and she was also a History teacher which was useful as I used to work in that sector. However, something that I think probably put me at a disadvantage was the fact that she was doing some thing where she wasn't going to be drinking any alcohol for the whole of January. I don't really understand these sorts of things as I sometimes go for a whole month without any booze and I don't even notice so I can only imagine that she's normally a big drinker.

After a couple of drinks (soft ones for her) we called it a night as it was getting late and at the end of the evening I was actually surprised by how much I'd fancied her. We said our goodbyes and although I'm always pessimistic about second dates, I thought there was a really good chance of her wanting to meet up again as the evening had been a good laugh and, in my eyes, there was a lot of potential.

How wrong I was. I sent her a message the next day saying that I'd had a really enjoyable evening and I asked her if she wanted to meet up again and she replied by saying: 'nice to meet you too but I think I'd like to leave it as one night.' Although she was being honest, I found that a bit patronising (anyone else think that too?). And after brushing these knock-backs aside in the past I am actually starting to seriously wonder what women are actually looking for and what (if anything) I'm doing wrong. I also think that if she'd had her beer goggles on then another date would have happened. Possibly. 

Date 75

"Money Changes Everything."

My third and final date using Lovestruck and I was glad to delete my profile when my 3 month subscription ended. Any replies to messages or profile views from other members ended after about 2 weeks of being on there so I really didn't get my money's worth.

I contacted this person within the first few days of being on the site and she very quickly gave me her phone number...without me even asking for it. So, very soon we agreed to meet in Richmond at 4pm one Saturday afternoon. It went very well and we got on splendidly, although she really hit the red wine and even after eating at a restaurant, she peaked too early and we had to call it a night at about 8pm as she was very merry.

I was very keen to see her again so I texted her a day or so later and asked her if she wanted to go to the flicks. I won't say which film as I'll just be laughed at, but she said yes and seemed very excited. Although, probably by the film I'd suggested rather than seeing me again. Apart from the fact that the cinema's heating had broken down and it was -2 outside, thus forcing us to don scarves and gloves half way through, the film was decent...and ok, I'll give you a clue what we saw: I'm Team Edward all the way. Afterwards she asked me to walk her back to her car which was about 10 minutes away and she then gave me a lift back to near my bus stop, although I had to suddenly jump out at some traffic lights which was a bit of an abrupt end to the evening as I barely could say goodbye and I didn't have a clue how the evening had gone.

I heard from her briefly over Christmas but then the trail went dead. As luck would have it though, I managed to acquire a couple of tickets for my beloved BUG at the BFI (hosted by Adam Buxton). I hadn't been for a year as tickets are like gold dust, but for some bizarre reason there were still a few for sale which is extremely rare as it's almost always sold out very quickly. I'd found out on our first date that she was a big fan of Mr Buxton, although she'd never heard of, let alone been to BUG which I was amazed at. So, although, I hadn't bought them especially for her, I told her that I had a spare and she jumped at the chance.

As it turned out, it was the best BUG I'd been to for ages and some of it was so funny that I couldn't breathe as I was laughing so much. She really enjoyed it too. However, afterwards we had a few drinks and she never once offered to pay for her ticket or buy me drinks. I couldn't obviously ask her for the money and while they were only £15, to me that's just a bit rude, is it not?

Although I got a text from her to thank me for the evening later on, I've not heard from her since so I'm just going to leave it as I actually can't be bothered to chase her. Whilst we got on well, I felt that she wasn't really putting any effort into things as I'd chosen the venues for each date and I still feel her not offering to pay for BUG was a little bit naughty. The fact that she was a smoker also bothered me a little bit too. I stopped smoking almost 4 months ago and it's still a real struggle for me. I realise it's completely hypocritical of me but having to sit out in the freezing cold while she smoked fag after fag before BUG was really unbearable, and maybe I'm better off without the temptation.